For those who does not know it, I'm working on a graphic novel called The Recreators. I've never done a graphic novel before. I haven't actually drawn or painted much for the past twenty years before this project. On the other hand, it wasn't meant that I would do the artwork myself from the beginning. Things do however rarely go as planned.
Apart from me being slightly stressed because I've invested in a domain name, web hotel and some other things, I found this an amazingly welcomed opportunity for me to learn to paint.
I feel I should produce faster and live up to promises and get a product finished, but when I think about it feels like the wrong attitude. Why do we produce things? We need an income to pay for food and shelter and all that. But what about the rest? What about all the things we do when there is no money involved? We do it for fun and for learning.
Isn't that was life is really about? To learn and develop?
Of course I want there is hope for paid jobs through this project. But the more I think about it, the more I feel I need to relax and just enjoy the learning part of this. Instead of feeling annoyed by my mistakes I can think about it as a lesson in how not to do certain things. That is learning too.
When I lying on my deathbed I find it highly unlikely that I will regret all the pages of the graphic novel I didn't produce. I think I rather regret the things I didn't bother to learn while doing those pages I did.
Why are Western societies so fixed on producing? I'd rather write one book that changed me than ten which didn't develop me at all as an author.